I was reflecting recently on people who have made a significant impact on me just on their natural perspective. You know those people you meet who stand out from the rest, the way they deal with a situation and flip it in a way that’s non-standard. It’s like they look at a challenge as a hidden advantage?

The Silver Lining Mindset

One of those people that came to mind is a close colleague, Jacco van der Kooji, when I had coffee with him about 10 years back. He told me his car was broken into early that day. The thief took his mobile hotspot. A terrible way to start the day! That was my initial reaction. But Jacco simply shrugged and said, “It’s great—we were looking to get out of our T-Mobile contract anyway, so this actually works out for us!”

Optimism in action. Instead of dwelling on what was lost, he saw a hidden benefit—a way to turn a frustrating event into something productive. Jacco runs a wildly successful consulting organization, Winning by Design, and his optimism in contagious. Just watch his videos, especially the ones where he dances with unabandoned enthusiasm.

Life is 10% What Happens to You, 90% How You React

Setbacks happen to all of us. The difference between those who thrive and those who spiral is how they react to the setbacks. An optimist sees challenges as fuel for growth, not as roadblocks.

A pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees opportunity in every difficulty. This fundamental shift changes the game. It’s hard work to shift this perspective if you don’t naturally gravitate toward optimism.

Turning ADHD into an Advantage

As a kid, I was diagnosed with ADHD and was viewed as a problem. It was so much so that I was held out of public school and homeschooled instead. My brothers were also homeschooled because of this, but while they loved it, I viewed this as being held back from making friends, being “normal” and ultimately felt as I was a victim.

It wasn’t until I started to research ADHD benefits that I turned the problem into an asset. I started researching all the famous, successful people in history who had been diagnosed with ADHD—people who separated themselves as special because of it.

Walt Disney is one famous example of someone who had ADHD. He dropped out of school at a young age and went on to found the Disney empire. The one who really stuck out to me was Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Obviously there’s no known diagnosis but many believe that because of his boundless energy, impulsivity, and ability to hyper-focus on composing music, Mozart had characteristics associated with ADHD. Despite his struggles with structure and conventional education, he became one of the most prolific and influential composers of all time. His ability to create complex compositions seemingly out of thin air demonstrates how an unconventional mind can lead to extraordinary brilliance.

_{Research suggests Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart had ADHD and contributed to his erratic behavior, as well as his musical gifts.}

These stories reinforced with me that ADHD wasn’t a setback, but a gift that gave me the confidence to be “different”, and “different” was also “special”. I quickly transformed my thinking and embraced who I was.

I started thinking, I’m special—not in a boastful way, but in a way that built my confidence to push beyond what people thought was possible. Instead of seeing my ADHD as a limitation, I saw it as a tool that allowed me to think differently, process information quickly, and see solutions where others saw obstacles.

Later in life, I faced another challenge: breaking into sales. Because I was homeschooled, many people assumed I wouldn’t be a good fit—homeschoolers were often stereotyped as overly introverted. But again, the difference could be the separator.

Growing up, I had to proactively make friends—I wasn’t surrounded by classmates, so I had to earn my social connections. That skill translated into building relationships in sales. Today, when people ask how long I’ve been in sales, I reply with “All my life”. You had to be interesting and interested in people to make friends.

Instead of seeing my unconventional background as a disadvantage, I reframed it as an edge. And it worked.

How to Build the Optimist’s Playbook

1. Reframe the Narrative

When something goes wrong, stop and ask: “Is there a silver lining here?” You don’t have to ignore the frustration—but don’t let it control you. Instead, look for how you can make the most of the situation.

2. Take Action Instead of Dwelling

When a setback happens, you have two choices: dwell on it or do something about it. Optimists lean into action, even when the path forward isn’t clear.

3. Use Setbacks as Feedback

Not getting what you want right away isn’t failure—it’s data. Every misstep gives you insight into what works and what doesn’t. View challenges as an opportunity to learn, pivot, and improve.

4. Surround Yourself with Forward-Thinkers

Negativity is contagious, but so is optimism. If you spend time around people who see possibilities instead of problems, that mindset will rub off on you.

5. Practice Gratitude Daily

One of the easiest ways to develop an optimistic mindset is by recognizing what’s already good in your life. Start and end your day by listing a few things you’re grateful for—it’s a small habit with a big impact.

A Final Thought: Flip the Script

Life will always throw curveballs. You’ll face challenges, setbacks, and disappointments. But here’s the thing—you get to choose the story you tell yourself about them. You can see a door closing, or you can notice the window opening right next to it.

The optimist’s playbook isn’t about pretending everything is great all the time. It’s about choosing to focus on possibilities rather than limitations, action over frustration, and resilience over defeat.

So the next time life hands you an unexpected setback, ask yourself: Where’s the opportunity hiding in this? You might be surprised at what you find.